I can feel you very near It’s as if you are here Is it a mirage, is it a shadow, Or memories from long ago? Celebrating my new blog template that allows short posts, Remembering all those that have come and gone before.
I want to climb on a rooftop and shout to the world I want to call you all, one by one, and talk and talk I want to just jump up and down, and down again Till I have to no more voice and no more breath. I want to keep smiling till my cheeks…
I wish someone would pierce a dagger through my chest
Pull it in and out and then a few times more, and more.
I wish I would dip myself in oil boiling in a pot on a raging fire
To feel myself melt away from the reality of worldly life.
I wish I could be trampled on by the wildest of the beasts
And be made one with the earth that rests beneath their feet.
I wish there would be a whirlwind that lifts me high into the sky
Just to swirl me round and round till there is nothing left to be.
I wish they would tie my limbs and pull them apart from east and west
Till I break down into a million pieces never to be put together again.
I wish I would jump from atop the highest mountain into the deepest abyss
So that all that remains would be the memory of what once was.
I wish a smaller pain would be mine than that that haunts my burning soul
Anything else but the deep dark abyss that is my heart’s eternal home.
I wonder if it is the lucidity of the blood
Flowing freely down the lanky arm
Criss-crossing past the veins
Till the tip of the long yellowing finger nails?
Or is it the takeover by the bright crimson
Of the white of my ghostly pale skin
Till the memory of anything monochrome
Is just a faded image, as if it never were?
Could it be the sound of the blade
As it elegantly swishes past its enemy
Could it be the ecstasy in my heart
At the inevitability of whatâ€™s in store?
Could it be happy anticipation
Of the pain that will give me my pleasure
Could it be the pleasure of control
Of inviting death, at one’s own accord?
Could it be this moment, and nothing else
That I had spent my whole life waiting for?
Born perhaps to live, but certainly to die
If the destination is so near, why travel so far?
Defying life, defying all,
I give up my life, in happy delirium
For in pleasure, we seek pain,
And in pain, we find our pleasure.
Bluffmaster, I was called Placing the cards, thatâ€™s all it took An ace when it should be a king A queen for a nine An eight for a ten A puny two for the regal prince. Keep a straight face And no one will ever know No blink of the eye No twitch of the…
A Eulogy to a deserted friend A meandering river, that knows not where its headed. It twists and turns at every little rock and rift, headed somewhere, no one knows where Not even me, though I hold the pen. A gentle wind that whispers. Thoughts that were always there, but never heard before Caresses with…
The last of the leaves on the trees in my garden gave in to the strong Dutch winds today, and I sadly bid farewell to my favourite season – If fall be a lady, she would be fair; With flaming red hair And beauty beyond compare. If fall be a lady, She would have class;…
An ode to the smudges in our pristine lives I glance pensively at my long lived life I see a pure white sheet with a lone dark stain; And I can’t help but reminisce on that sordid spot. Many a years have passed since that eventful day Yet how could I ever forget the guilt…